Thank you Jesus for the Storm

Yesterday was a rough day for me. I was not myself yesterday and my mind was preoccupied and my heart was just hurting and I didn't know how to fix it. Then, around dinner time, I started to hear thunder. Then it started raining. Hard. Then it stopped. Then it started up again. And I fell asleep. Throughout the night, I'd wake up and there was flickers of lightning and it was still raining.

This morning. The sky was beautiful. It was a deep blue. The grass was still wet. All the plants were greener than they usually are. What a gorgeous day. I got on Facebook and posted this: "Dear Jesus. Thanks for giving us a storm, because the today looks AMAZINGLY beautiful." And something clicked. I was totally reminded that God has my back.

If you know me. Like really know me. Heard my story. I will tell you that I have learned a lot about suffering and character, and perseverence, and hope.

Romans 5:1-5 (Take note of 3-5)

Therefore, since we have been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ. Through him we have also obtained access by faith into this grace in which we stand, and we rejoice in hope of the glory of God.

More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.

In the original text, Paul writes "rejoice BECAUSE of our sufferings," not just in the midst of our sufferings. (Because really... who can do that?!) I talk a lot about how I embrace this verse, I rejoice in my sufferings... but I do it after. After I've gotten to the other side. Haha!! There are some times when I realize it half way through, and it gets me through faster. In my anger, my sadness, my insecurity--I realize, "This will build me. This will build me. God doesn't do anything in vain."

James 1:2-4

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

Suffering --> Endurance

Endurance --> Character

Character --> Hope

Considering what we do to ourselves--we put on this pretty face and smile so that no one knows what is going on on the inside--I have to remind myself of verse 5, "AND HOPE DOES NOT PUT US TO SHAME." There are times when I just want to be sad. Haha. I just want to sit and reflect on what I am feeling, why I am feeling it, I want to break down and lay it all out at Jesus' feet. But, something tells me not to. Yesterday I also posted on Facebook: SOS in morse code. Haha. It was my way of saying, "Help" without really saying help.

And I am SO good at that... pretty face, pretty smile thing, that people just thought I was bored and needed something funky to post up. Haha. One person emailed just to check up, more than once. And I love that woman. She is amazing and I am so glad to have an opportunity to be a part of her life.

In Romans 1:16, Paul says, "I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes." I am NOT ashamed of what God's done in my life, or at least I shouldn't be. Hope is the thing that keeps me going. I have a hope that one day, one person will need to hear my story. Hope is what makes Christians different. I have a hope for eternity.

Romans 8:18

For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.

Thank you Jesus for the storms in my life.

Because, as cliche as it sounds, the day after is always beautiful.